Men and women definitely come from different planets, this is what I get to realize every single day. Relationships take such a big effort to work. Has it always been so hard? I am not judging from my own case only, but my perception from all the friends around me, single, married or in open relationships. People compromising for the sake of being in a relationship, albeit of lower standards, or ending up miserable and alone just for the sake of persisting to their own values and standards. Should I stay or should I go? There is always a cost you have to pay.
And then, there is the trend of friends with extra benefits, recently introduced in our culture and gaining increasing percentages of supporters! It didn’t use to be like that as far as I remember in my times and I am not even that old! Friends with benefits are supposed to save you the energy of trying to make a gap close and spare you the effort you consume trying to maintain a proper relationship while it gives you the extra benefits (of sleeping over, that is!). I haven’t myself been able to see where the benefit lies in an open relationship, where you promise for no emotional attachments, no commitments and responsibilities towards your partner. What I know is that there will always be blood, ie. someone pays the price in such a negotiation and it is the weakest link! I just hope it is not going to be me...
But to come back to my initial point, it is so damn difficult to communicate with a man! They seem to have their own perception of space, time, friendships and love. In ther list of priorities, you would probably fall in the last bullets, if he were to be truly sincere with you. First goes the football, formula, or basketball, then the hanging out with mates (without you obviously, because you do not belong to the same circle), then it's the doing errands for mother or sister (because oh, they love the women of their life), then the job and making more money. And then it is their perception of what truth and sincerity is in a relationship. According to them, "small" or "innocent" as they call them, lies are better be told rather than hurt or upset you. And this is totally justifiable to them. But the truth is that they are only worried to spare them the discussion, complaining and nagging from your part. They just don't feel like being told off for their choices and they rather conceal it from you. Period. They seem to have a particular problem of being true to themselves and their partner about what they really want. They rarely ask or explicitly say what they really want from a relationship. Period.
No single man has a different list than previously described, unless they have grown so old they are no longer needed, or cannot physically do most of the mentioned things. At that point, they decide they can settle down and have a family, with the kind request of not being that much bothered with the child up-bringing unless for weekends or days off! And yes, this is where you come in to the scene. Excuse me, but with this kind of attitude, women have decided that they will too adopt the same mentality and invest their time and energy in career, friends, immediate family, materialism. Yes, my career never abandons me and my Prada is always by my side when I need her! Cheers to that and our modern times!
